REBOUND REBOUND

Since Monday Ive been back trying to lose my weight again. I haven't weighted myself that day but I saw myself at 144kg a few days before. The problem is that my home scales is the maximum of 140kg. Yeah I know since January my weight has increased all the time and I said I'd done something about it, but I never did and it came a time when now I only have a few clothes that fit me again and that I get really moody coz of me being so fat.

So I wonder why did I let my mind and will let loose and lose all momentum when I got to 130kg in January... maybe after getting Chicken pox I really didnt care about things and really just fancied eatting what i want and not care of my body...

I cant understand why ppl get into a rebound state thou, u hit that cycle of the way u eat, the way u wake up and live ur life and contiune to do that. Many times I said I would get back in the way of losing weight I focus on a few days then forget about it and go back to the old horrible ways. Stop going swimming, stop walking in the mornings, stop using my mountain bike, stop eating healthier food. You get in a way and its hard to stop doing the easy life, the lazy life.

I know its only a day has gone past but I feel that Im focused again. Ive stopped buying food, sweet bread from the convience stores. I think the next big step for me is to start making my own obento boxes again. Getsu, Ka and Sui I buy obento boxes for me and two other teachers at 262 yen for then its dirt cheap but Im sure they are high in calories thou I tend to buy for me what I think would be low calorie obento boxes.

Lets keep my fingers crossed and try getting it down again

My angry!!

I thought I'd voice my thoughts here. LOL no its not about my diet thats gone pear shape!!
Its about this stupid "FortiGuard". Which is installed on with all computers!! I cant either access any computer data that is blocked by the word ゲーム game
個人広告、出会い系 meeting place talk place
Facebook, mixi and youtuble all blocked, now I have to figgle with my fingers and find something to do. It was nice to surf the net and look for things and now its not even worth using the computers at work. I will still take the advantage of printing or getting vital infomation for English classes thou. They just took the fun out of fun!!

Doing it

Quitting world of warcraft after 4 years of the addicate game, Trying to do new changes in my life, taking time to study Japanese, Actually I am studying Japanese!! I have so much free time now its unreal. Sometimes actually bored too much time on my hands, COuld be studying in that time I guess

Weight is at 132.8kg. Ive been in that mood of weight myself everyday. That has to stop

Ive caught a cold or something, ive been sweating alot and rested in bed, dont have a fever thou. Have a painful cough, a snuffed up nose and sore throat thou that has gone down abit now

I'm doing it

I could have been under 127kg by now I reckon oh well I shouldn't really think about that. I should think about now and the future, Really cant let this happen again

135.6kg its weird Ive lost a kg, didnt go for that walk but im eating healthier. Only a day but Im on the right track right?. LMAO my wife came in from work last night, and asked what my weight was.. I had to say 131 kg still. She said are u sure??,, We will weigh u tomorrow. I said I dont weigh myself until next week now.
I told she knows I've put weight on or she just read my blog somehow >.<

Meeting been cancelled today in Nagoya so I'm off swimming today, I need to hide my body from the MIL I think she might see Ive put weight on too. So need to get into the pool before she see me.

A downer

I guess I could write it down, I guess I could tell the wife, but I guess im writing it here, no one sees my blog, yet all the ppl that see it dont know me in real life.
I know Im in that stage again, I can feel the rebound, I can feel my shirts getting alittle tighter, so why the fuck am i not doing anything about it.

I can blame many things but I should be blaming myself, last night wife had work from 4pm, thats give the whole night to binge eat. 11pm I'm still hungry I go and rent some dvds out, get some snacks from the convience store, Im eating like a pig, I think for a second and then what the hell to it. All gone

I'm in that cycle, that frame of mind, that bullshit that I cant get out, should I ask a friendly site to help me, for them to judge me? should I?

I really need to get out of this place that Im in, do it do it now, U need to stop, stop taking money out with u, stop at stopping at convience stores, start eating healthier, start drinking more water. greentea, start EXERCISING! START GOING FOR THEM WALKS, START GOING TO THE GYM.
I have 4hr free time today between lesssons Ive packed my bags for the gym, now it depends if I will go or not, I want to go but does this sickness, Is it a sickness is it me being silly. Probably but I need to change, really I can see me falling back to the same stage 2 years ago where i lost the weight and then place it back on b4 I heading back to England.

Im typing coz I just scaled myself and im 136.8kg fuck! A shocker a downer, Im gutted.
I know the wife suppects ive put weight on, i know she knows. I have to stop now.

Ill report here tomorrow andtell u if ive changed, (fingers crossed)

******************

Just a quick update, eat much healthier today, I think im still eating too much white bread.
Banana on toast no butter and a kiwi, 12noon Odon and rice, Banana, 3pm Apple, 4.30 banana sandwich (2 slices of bread) 7.30pm Chicken on white bread (2 slices)

Didnt go to the gym too bloody cold but planning to go for a walk this evening..

I let myself down

135KG DEAD ON A MAJOR 5KG UP IN A MONTH ;(

Since I got since after getting chicken pox my diet has been out on limp. My whole diet is on hold, and really think i just cant be arsed to do so. I really its down to lazyness and playing a silly game in the mornings instead of going for a walks.

I know for a fact that I've been going to go to convience store in the mormnings and after coming from work and buying bread, or sweet bread. THIS HAS TO STOP!

FROM NOW ON IM BACK TO THE WAY I WAS B4, so NO STOPPING AT CONVIENCE STORES,

I SHOULD ALSO BE MAKING MY OWN OBENTO's AND TAKE MY OWN DRINK TO WORK

Hitting that mark.

I hit 130.2kg today. The last 6weeks have been not so good.

I recently caught Chicken pox in the first days of the New Year. In the morning of going to see Avatar in 3D I felt shit, I felt tired, I felt that I've been staying up to late. So most of the day I slept. Trying to sleep it off for the movie in the evening. After the movie, which I must say is very good and if u havent seen it yet u should on the big screen.
I came back not feeling very hunary and went to bed I woke up a few times feeling very hot and sweaty but I didnt think I was ill. Or even have a fever.

The next day when the wife came home she said that I had spots on my face, I didnt think it was chicken pox I thought I had an allegric. I know that I didnt have it when I was a kid but I did have the injection to prevent from getting it.
My temp rose to 39.4. I found it hard to eat coz I had blister in my mouth and throat, I even had blisters on my priavte parts >.<

For a week all I could eat was Jellu and Homemade banana milkshakes and icecream.
My weight dropped down to 129kg, you cant really count that since my lack of food and because when I got better and fancied a Macdonalds set and to eat some chocolate. I hide the rubbish in my bedroom >.< then forgot about it.

My wife found it and did her nut. Rebound!! Rebound!! she shouted you gonna put that weight back on that you lost.
Its hard to explain my action, u know I just fancied that! Then go back to a healthier lifestyle again, sometimes we can do that, but for my wife or her mother they dont think like that.
In a way it was good that she found it, coz now I'm back on track! To be honest my weight did creep up back to 132kg but when I saw that, its time to stop!!

Little by little I'm getting into exercising again. I havent been to the gym I just slack at that Ive started to go walking again, and go back to Kempo. I havent been swimming coz my bodies been covered with spots. I havent been cycling coz its too dam bloody cold!

So now Im 130.2kg. Thats good news right?
Need to get down to my wedding weight at 115kg before I head back to England for the summer!